Archive for the ‘Currently’ Category

Currently, the April ’18 Edition

Saturday, April 14th, 2018

It’s mid-month, so I’m back with another edition of State of the Looney.

I’m enjoying some well-earned munching, as I’ve just finished my 100 days of no junk -challenge. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I have not missed this feeling of being fucking stuffed. I mean sure, chocolate is good and all, but I feel monumentally better if I only eat it like maybe four times a year. Which means I’ve actually learned something. Who’da thunk, ay.

I’m thinking about tomorrow, since it’s going to be my first day of running for this year. I was just out for a proper walk with a mate and when we parted ways I decided to give running a go. Just to see if I’d be up for it after a winter-long break. Also I was wearing my brand new running shoes, just to wear them in a bit before hitting the track and so I ran about 100 meters and it felt good. No breathlessness, no tiring of the thighs even after a roughly 90 minute brisk walk, so I’m fairly confident I’ll be ok. I’m going with the Couch to 5k -app, again, for the third time, but I feel it’s well worth it. Sort of soothes me into my regular 5k runs. I’m going to try for 8-10k by the end of this summer, so yea I have a Goal and all. Can’t wait to go really.

I’m not eating anything at this precise moment, but just a second ago I was basically inhaling a Mignon -chocolate egg. A Finnish traditional delicacy, which is just a normal eggshell filled with nougat. Yes, a whole eggshell filled with solid nougat.

I’m drinking water, because holy shit chocolate makes me thirsty. I should get back to my usual water routine, as I’ve slipped a bit during these past few days. I’ve been eating so much I’ve had no room for water. That’s due to change tomorrow, because hello getting back to weightloss and excercise and PROPER EATING oh god I love eating all these veggie foods I’ve made recently. But I digress.

I’m wearing my joggers and a long-sleeved t-shirt, along with a pair of leg warmers, my slippers and a cardie. You will not catch me without my cardie during snowy months, I promise you. I’m also wearing a ton of make-up, because it was my dad’s seventieth birthday party today (well half of party anyways) and I decided to try and look presentable for a change.

I’m listening to a nature sounds playlist on Spotify, as I feel I need something to block out the silence as I’m writing. And having songs playing tends to distract me quite a bit. So yea, crickets, rain, birds it it.

I’m waiting for a shipment from Kikki.K, which is stuck in customs and since postal services in this country are in a dreadful state (yes i realise i’m slagging my own employer) I’m going to have to wait for a letter to arrive (probably on monday i hope) so I can customs clear the shipment online and pay the vat and whatnots and then wait for the parcel to get here, which I hope happens on Tuesday, but I’m kinda certain it’ll be on a Wednesday. So meh. I’ve also ordered in some bits and bobs for the kid and I want that to arrive, but that’s unlikely to happen until at least Thursday. And I’ve got a bunch of stuff coming over from China, but god knows how long those will take. Ughhh.

It’s been a bitterly cold and fucking long winter around these parts, but the good news is that the snow is finally melting, the weather‘s clearing and it seems like there might be a spring after all. Yay. There’s been a forecast showing over 10 degrees during days and I believe it’s not much below zero during the nights either. And it hasn’t been snowing in over a week.

I’m feeling quite confident about me at this moment. And I have been feeling the same for a good while. Ever since I started to make the conscious change in the way that I think. I try to focus on the positive things and most nights I’ve written down a few things I’m grateful for. That’s helped a lot and wouldn’t you know, thinking positively makes me feel more positive overall. I’m… I’m kind of bummed that I’ve been wasting a lot of time being negative. I mean sure, sarky is a whole another thing, I’m still the sour, sarky old biddy I’ve always been, but in a general sense I’ve been overhauling my thought process. And so far it’s been a blast.

I’m wondering how long it will take for the biggest (and meanest) pile of snow to melt from our yard. I promise you I’m not joking, the pile is about two meters high and it’s mostly snow that’s been falling off from the garage roof, so it’s proper jammed pile too. Also it’s on the side of the building that gets almost no direct sunlight at all, so that’s not helping either. I’m guessing there might still be some snow in there come May 20th, but it also might be that I get pissed at it and just hack away with it when it gets at least a little bit less intimidating.

So yea, that’s what’s going on with the resident town fool. Let me know how you’re doing, I love hearing about you.


Tuesday, February 13th, 2018

Hi, hey, hello.
I’m just wooshing by here to tell you that I’m sort of otherwise engaged with blowing up every nook and cranny of my house to get some godforsaken order into this chaos I find myself living in. And no, haven’t moved or anything, but it’s been a long-ass time since I’ve had any interest in keeping my house in order and actually you know like bothering with anything?

So I’m taking the opportunity and going with the cleaning/decluttering I feel like doing, since -knowing my cleaning habits (haha what habits -you, shut it -me)- it might not last very long.

I have a lot of ideas for actually doing some … interioring and home-decoring and all that shite, so yea…

Also I may have a bit of a crush on Hermione Chantal. She’s my idol.

Currently, the Jan ’18 edition

Thursday, January 18th, 2018

Here we are, well settled into the new year (ha ha! *hides knife behind back*) and well on our way to breaking every resolution we made the mistake to make. So what better way to begin a ghastly routine than making a State of the Nation post.

At this fine evening I’m enjoying a well-earned moment of Peace & Quiet™ after a day of having the underaged male representative of the family being a right pisshead and shouting constantly the whole afternoon. Only thing I can hear now are the sounds the keyboard is making and the guinea pigs having their Nightly Hay Dance. Quite a racket, but I promise you, I’m not the least bit bothered about that.

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about my actual work but also my dream about making money from my craft. It’s a somewhat distant dream, but it’s something that I hope is going to provide me with some extra cash. I have also been thinking about what it looks like in haunted houses when it’s laundry day, but that’s something I’m thinking about more or less every idle moment. Still haven’t quite figured it out. Any ideas?

I’m sticking to not-eating sweets, but oh my fucking lord it’s hard, especially when you have half of your obscenely large tin of Quality Streets still in your Cupboard of Plenty, just sitting there quietly. When I’m done with the 100 days I’m aiming at first, I’ll bloody well eat every last bit of them. (watch me have maybe six and then feeling all bleugh)

I’ve been drinking so much water lately, that I feel like I’m sploshing around when I’m walking. I’m not, but I feel like I am. Also, unsurprisingly, I’m pissing like a racehorse al through the day. Tmi, I know, but you (two) know me well enough by now.

If someone had told me ten, even five years ago that I’ll be wearing leggings with dresses and cardies, I’d probably punch them in the face. But here we are, ten million cardies later…

These past few weeks (yes it’s been almost three) I’ve been listening to my old spotify playlists when I’m walking or going to the gym. For the longest time I only listened to the saved song list, scrolling up and down on it, trying to find a suitable string that would not frustrate me whilst exercising. And one day I just put on one of my playlists from 2012-ish, and let me tell u. East 17 is still fucking brilliant, and yes, no shame, I know Gold by heart.

I’ve been ordering a ton of jewelry-related stuff from Wish and whilst I know that they’re due to arrive sometime around mid-February, I’m kinda wanting them to be here tomorrow. The latest. I’ve also set up a rewards system for myself when it comes to losing weight, and I just put in an order for a big, chunky dot grid bujo notebook, and I’m wanting that to arrive today or sooner. Mind you, I’ve tried bullet journaling, but I didn’t quite like it, probably because I wasn’t committing to it like full-time, but sort of kept it as a side-ho to my beautiful ring-bound a5 Kikki.K. This time I’m … sort of not sure I’ll even start it right away, but I just wanted to have it, because a) it was a thing of beauty and b) ya know just in case.

I don’t like winter, I’ve probably mentioned it a few times. So yea. It’s two-feet+ of snow, more coming in in a rather horizontal way, it’s as cold as in polar bears arse and to top it off, it’s windy as fuck. So whuppi-fucking-doo, it’s a shit weather.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I’ve started on a new medication for my misfiring brain. It took me some time to actually believe that it was working. Or maybe it took my brain a month or so to recover from the question mark it formed into, as serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine actually fired when they were supposed to instead of going fucking ballistic every time basically anything happened. But yea, I’ve been feeling a lot better lately. Better, tho, is probably the blandest word to describe the multitude of improvements happening in my life. I feel more sort of … able. And not in a manic way. It’s not that gleamy-eyed, feverish drive to do things, but a nice sort of motivated and sort of orderly feeling of being able to. I have some fears, due to the earlier medical trials, about my writing, and since it’s been a good while since I’ve written anything more than a shopping list or a shitpost, I’m sort of anxious about it, but on the other hand this doesn’t feel like a blank space, but more as an internal processing period. So I’m kind of optimistic about that too. I should just try to allocate time for my writing, regularly, so I would get Shit™ Done™.

And lastly, to finish off with a positive tune, something I’m trying to do more in my life as a whole this year, I have booked an appointment for a facial for tomorrow, at a local beauty salon. I got a voucher as a christmas present and I’m more than delighted I was able to book a time in such short notice. The salon I’ve been to before had bookings for like closer to two months ahead. Mind you, it was very much not a problem for me, as I am flexible with my schedules, and the young lady worked as a solo entrepreneur with no one to share the space with. And she was lovely, and the treatments were more than excellent. So I’m sort of wondering if this new (to me) place can match the experience. What I’m positive about is is that I’ll enjoy it.

Have a nice rest of the week, all (one, who managed to read this whole thing) of you and do tell me what kind of positive experiences you have had with beauty salons. I’m determined to keep this place nice this year, so no wiping your snotty fingers on your trouser knee and for goodness sake, try to remember that the fork is used to transport food from the plate to your mouth, not the knife.

Year in review, 2017 edition

Sunday, December 31st, 2017

A year ago I was adamant on taking 2017 by the throat and curb-stomping it, if it tried to fuck with me. It probably hasn’t, at least as much as 2016 did, but I still can’t say I’d be too sad to see this year die.

I’ve had a lot of good moments this year. I went to my darling London with my husband, met Adam who is an awesome guy, I’ve made a few friends over Instagram and cut some poisonous people out of my life. I’ve been mostly in love with Fassbend(me ov)er, but I still haven’t forgot to squee over Kinnaman (come on, the trailers for Altered Carbon are something else, man). Being in the Fassy fandom has brought me so many laughs because people are complete dorks and it’s brought me so many happy moments, because people have been incredibly kind to eachother. I’ve managed to land myself a job that I like and I’m capable of doing, despite my crippled mind. And I’ve started taking new medication for my illness, which has brought me some much needed mental stability, at least for now. I have been writing a lot, mostly working on one of my most ambitious fiction works to this day, but I’ve also exercised in smaller pieces, some lost ideas and I’ve tried new ways of writing. I’ve also laid ground work for my secret business dream and I have sort of high hopes for it for this year.

On the other hand, I set myself a bunch of goals, all well within my limitations, but I haven’t met single one of those. I can partly blame my unmedicated mind for it, but I can’t completely relieve myself from responsibility. I’ve been a terrible slag the whole year, when it comes to blogging, staying healthy and exercising. I mean I’m not in the worst of shapes, I did run 5k runs throughout most of the summer, but I could’ve done way better than that.

So this year, I’ll set pretty much the same goals, but instead of just diving in head first, I’ll do what has helped me before: plan it all out. What will be different this time is the fact that I’m (reasonably) sane at this moment, and I know in what I failed this past year. So it’s all a process of learning. I know how not to approach reaching my goals, but can try a different method. I need to set my sights on smaller steps and not try to manage the big picture in my everyday life, that shit didn’t fly. So instead of thinking what will be in three months time, or in six months, I’ll focus every morning to the next 24 hours ahead of me and only compare myself to the person I was the day before.

I have also picked a mantra for 2018. It’s a simple thing, but it’s effective:

Want it? Work fucking harder.

State of the Nation: August 2017 edition

Saturday, August 19th, 2017

It’s been a while since anything moved around these parts. But hey, I’m here and you’re here. Thanks for that, mate.

Right now-ish I’m

enjoying a nice cup of tea after a day of Doing a Lot of Thingsā„¢, which include digging up stones on the yard, picking raspberries (that i won’t even eat, but mom does) and sorting out our Barbie-stuff from childhood with me sister. The whole lot, two horses and carriage and a kitchen set and a fuckton of other sets are going off to my mate’s kid, for when she turns however old you need to be to know how to properly treat vintage toys.

thinking about how much I’d like to be rummaging through the seemingly endless amount of storage boxes I have that are filled with stuff I probably won’t need. Ever. But then again, it’s nearly midnight and kid’s asleep so I won’t want to bother him. I guess I can get back into that tomorrow or something.

eating fudge. Damnit, I need to check local Lidl tomorrow if they have any more of those.

drinking Tetley tea (brewed for many, many minutes, until weapons-grade strength) from my Mrs. Michael Fassbender -mug

a thing of beauty, innit

wearing army green short shorts and a tank top (two things in life are certain; death and the fact that if you go to sleep in a tank top, one of your titties will be out when you wake up) and knee-high woolly socks, made especially for me by a good mate of mine.

listening Enjoy the Silence by KI Theory. This is… eerie, scary, desperate, good.

wanting for my orders from Kikki.K and Filofax to arrive (not holding my breath about the filofax one as the last one turned into a farce on an unprecedented scale) and also for people to stop being absolute twats. These two things have nothing to do with eachother, just in case anyone was wondering.

feeling somewhat content, if not counting the disgust I feel towards a load of people on social media. Mainly fb. Sticking to twitter and tumblr for a while and covering myself with Fassbender has never seemed a better idea than now.

wondering if I’ll fall asleep tonight in a relatively timely manner. (doubt it, ha-ha! -my brain) Or will I be writing my story in my head for a few hours, like every night for emh… a long time.

Also: weather-wise it’s been ace. It’s really been an uncommonly dry summer over these parts. It rained a lot last night, but before that it’s been… no rain for ages. I mean yea a drizzle or two every now and then, but like a proper, soaking rain? Nuh. I don’t think at all the whole summer? Ground is dry even now, if you dig like a centimeter deep. So yea, dry as fuck. Strange.

And those are the cards I’m playing with right this moment.