Archive for March, 2016

Fight it out

Tuesday, March 29th, 2016

Couple of years ago, when I was in my most fit, I used to go to Les Mills BodyCombat once a week and once a week to Les Mills BodyStep. Everytime after Combat I got this feeling. And that feeling is coming back now that I’ve been going a few times.

It’s a feeling that I can do absolutely anything, like I’m ready to conquer the world. I remember when I went to Combat and husband went to gym with his mate, I came out from the class and made angry faces at them, grinning and growling. I wanted to fight whatever obstacle was infront of me, preventing me from achieving my goals. I love that feeling and I’m so glad it’s coming back, because it keeps me going back, to fight out my anger and fustration towards myself. Mostly for being a lazy, lard-ass bitch who cannot be arsed to go out for even a walk.

I’m going to take this seriously this time. I’ve got my brain sorted with the pills, so now’s the time to sort out my body. I’m the only thing standing between me and the body I want to have. I can do this.

I fucking CAN.

Small business thoughts

Sunday, March 27th, 2016

I’m seriously contemplating on whether I should try my hand at small business. Mostly selling my craft and maybe somekind of design thing. I don’t know.

I mean I have been to a course about entrepreneurship, and during that time I became convinced that I wasn’t up for that. It might’ve been due to the fact that I was misinformed of what that course was about and the first thing we got asked was what is our business idea. I had none, because I was told it was about technicalities of being an entrepreneur and not about acutal setting up your business.

I’m not looking into this opportunity to get rich and start an empire, no. I would mostly like to employ myself and get some money from it, because it seems that at these parts of the world with my education, there are no jobs available. And I’m in such period of my life that working out of town isn’t really a viable option. My husband has a steady job here (thank god for small favours), we have a kid that is under two years and we have a house. So working in southern Finland for instance isn’t an option for me, but I’d still like to do something to provide a bit. Hence, small business it kinda has to be.

I wish there was a way to try it out without risks.

Today pt. 1

Thursday, March 24th, 2016

Today I’ve been
– enjoying a gruelling workout that made me sweaty as fuck but I don’t care, I love it.

– thinking about how finally there’s some justice in the world, Radovan Karadzic got a 40 year sentence for war crimes. If that’s not something to bring back some faith in The Hague criminal tribune, I don’t know what is.

– eating some pancake and lasagna. I like both very much.

– drinking the weirdest concoction of two teas (not by my own choice tho). It was vile. I hope I never have to endure such thing again.

– wearing my workout pants and top. The top is bright pink and I don’t give two fucks if I look like a cupcake in it.

– listening to Zeljko Joksimovic, after the longest break ever. I don’t know why I have been without him. God, that man can sing like whoa.

– wanting to get my order from Kikki.K, but alas the customs held it for one day too long and now I have to wait until after Easter to get it. Booo!

– weather-wise content. Other than there’s a light snowfall and I don’t want ANY MORE of that white shite.

– feeling quite good about myself, for a change. I think getting my arse up and to the gym makes a fuckton of difference in my moods.

– wondering how to tell a friend I’m worried about them. In a nice way, I only know dick ways.

End of childhood

Wednesday, March 23rd, 2016

The title is very dramatic. It’s supposed to be. In the light of recent events, the suicide bombing in Brussels and the Paris attacks and what have you, I’ve been thinking about war a lot.

When I was a kid, the Iran-Iraq war was on the news constantly. It was basically what I thought war as a word meant. It was no doubt a gruelling and hard to understand war, like most wars are. But it was on the news every night throughout my entire childhood. It ended when I was ten, and similarly I thought that wars in general were over.

I was so wrong.

In the beginning of the nineties, when I was starting to enter my teens, the awkward time in everyone’s lives where world is starting to make sense in a whole new way. When world seems to grow from the sand box in your yard to first your home town and later to the whole world. You start to understand that world is more than the glitz and glamour of The Bold and The Beautiful, more than the happy-go-lucky detective series, where the hero always saves the day. You start to understand that world is also the dark nights of Miami Vice where drug lords go unpunished, and you start to see the overflowing hatred between people that leads to wars, time and time again.

And because you are a kid born in the late seventies, you are a teen in a time of a war at the backyards of Europe, the whole debacle of Balkans in the early nineties. The war that initially came up with a term so vile and disgusting, ethnic cleansing.

I was in my teens and consumed MTV like any other kid my age (oh the good old times when mtv was a channel showing actual music videos) and you see the voice of the European youth united against the war. You have news stories and U2 with their ZooTV live covereages from the war torn Sarajevo. The war was pushed through our screens in all its horror, for years. It was horrible to watch, day in day out, and I can’t even begin to imagine what it was like to people who were there, suffering through it all. It was horrible, vile, disgusting. It was a clusterfuck in a monumental scale in so many aspects, this I’ve learned later.

To me that war was the end of childhood in many ways, the one thing that made me understand how the world needs a lot of work done before it can be called ‘humanity’. We can’t live in peace, maybe not ever, but I should hope that every one of us can act more civilized towards a fellow person.

Maybe that would make things a little better.

Shit on Sundays – Pt. 0001

Sunday, March 20th, 2016

61:Have you ever TPd someone’s house? No.
62:Who do you text the most? My bezzie, I guess.
63:What was the last movie you saw? I’ve been bingin on series lately, I can’t remember a film.
64:What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex? He loves me.
65:How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2010? 1.
66:Is the last person you kissed younger than you? Yes.
67:Do you curse around your parents? I curse around everyone. I’m a potty mouth.
68:Are you happy with where you live? Most of the time.
69. Picture of yourself? Yea. No. You can see me mug over to your left. And also on the about me -page.
70. Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships? I’m a firm believer in serial monogamy.
71. Have you ever been dumped? Yes.
72. What do you most like about making out? The making out part.
73. Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with? Yes. I’m a ho.
74. When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other? Look, I’ve been out of the dating game for so long that I can’t even remember these kinds of things.
75. What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive? Legs.
76. Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed? Husband.
77. Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour? Yes. I repeat for the backrow: I’M A HO.
78. Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

79. What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face? Well written, in character fanfic of my OTP.
80. Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? I don’t see why not.
81. Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you? No. 😀
82. Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush? No. I generally speaking don’t tell anyone anything anymore.
83. Do you miss your last sweetie? Definitely not.
84. Last time you slow danced with someone? Not that long ago. There was no music tho.
85. Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met? No.
86. How can I win your heart? Buy me food and make me laugh. I’m easy like that.
87. What is your astrological sign? Libra.
88. What were you doing last night at 12 AM? Is this midnight or midday? I get so confused with none-24h people.
89. Do you cook? Sure.
90. Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication? No.
91. If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship? I’m not single.
92. Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly? I’ve never gotten the concept of dating anyway, I was always more of a fuck and do one -type of person.
93. What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest? Nice legs. Like, forrealz.
94. Name four things that you wish you had: More money, an apartment in London, a nicer car, a miniature hamster.
95. Are you a player? I hate to say this, but yea.
96. Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day? Yes. Didn’t you get the memo? I’m a ho.
97. Are you a tease? That too.
98. Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr? Nope. Would like to tho.
99. Have you ever been deeply in love with someone? Yes. Currently am too.
100. Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with? Naah. Or maybe Johnnie.
101. Hugs or Kisses? Both is goos.
102. Are you too shy to ask someone out? I don’t recall being.
103. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Legs omfg this is getting boring. For me and for the reader. I’m so sorry to you (one) who still reads this.
104. Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe? Not cute, but nice.
105. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it? No, because I’m not a dick.
106. Do you flirt a lot? Yes.
107. Your last kiss? Twenty minutes ago.
108. Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2011? Nope.
109. Have you kissed anyone in the past month? Yes.
110. If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

111. Do you know who you’ll kiss next? Yes.
112. Does someone like you currently? I sure hope so.
113. Do you currently have feelings for anyone? Yes.
114. Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? I like both.
115. Ever made out with just a friend? Yes, because YOU KNOW WHY.
116. Are you happier single or in a relationship? In a relationship, I find.