Still writing

February 27th, 2018

I have been able to squeeze in some fic writing, amongst everything else going on. This one sort of started out a long time ago, but I’ve been pushing it aside for more relevant texts for this long. It still lives in my Lost Ideas folder, but time will tell if it moves to root. It promises to be something darker than my usual cups of tea (really? idk) because it deals with properly damaged people and I’m not getting into any of that here, it’s still only in a state of concept, but there’s something on the proverbial paper.

He opened the cupboard over the sink and grabbed a black mug that had a bit missing on the rim, setting it on the table and tossing in a bag of Tetley’s he took out of a tin that had a double decker bus on the lid. Whatever had possessed Michelle to buy one of those touristy boxes with shitty tea in it, was beyond him and when he’d asked her, she’d just laughed so hard he thought she’d burst and told him to suck it up. He sighed, stroking the lid on the box for a while and then pushed it back to its place. He still missed her something terrible, especially in the mornings. It all seemed so quiet without her banging her pots and pans just to piss him off and sometimes managing to put a decent breakfast on the table in the process. –Stop being a sentimental old biddy, he snorted to himself and opened the fridge door only to find that there was no milk. –Fucking fuck.



Busy

February 13th, 2018

Hi, hey, hello.
I’m just wooshing by here to tell you that I’m sort of otherwise engaged with blowing up every nook and cranny of my house to get some godforsaken order into this chaos I find myself living in. And no, haven’t moved or anything, but it’s been a long-ass time since I’ve had any interest in keeping my house in order and actually you know like bothering with anything?

So I’m taking the opportunity and going with the cleaning/decluttering I feel like doing, since -knowing my cleaning habits (haha what habits -you, shut it -me)- it might not last very long.

I have a lot of ideas for actually doing some … interioring and home-decoring and all that shite, so yea…

Also I may have a bit of a crush on Hermione Chantal. She’s my idol.



Yoga

February 1st, 2018

I used to do yoga, for about three years around 2010s. It was always in a school gym where the floors were freezing. I still loved it, it was once a week for 90 minutes. You started with a ten minute orientation and ended with ten minutes of relaxation, which, I must admit, led to me falling asleep a few times. But that was sort of the point, really. I even did a full weekend with the weirdest yoga instructor ever. It was some hardcore shit too, let me tell you, we’d stare at a candle flame for fifteen minutes, then blow out the candle and stare at the imaginary candle flame for another fifteen. I mean…

But it sort of lost its appeal to me, I couldn’t focus on it anymore and kept being distracted by my thoughts (perhaps it was a manic episode, who knows, those times are a bit blurry to me, for a variety of reasons) and so I quit. I tried a few poses at home, but it didn’t feel right and in the end I abandoned all yoga.

Until today. I’ve signed up for a new gym in town and they have a lot of classes, from Les Mills Combat (yAy!!) to yogalates (i’m sort of intrigued by this) to just plain yoga. Which I went to this evening. Sixty minutes of intense shit and I can tell you with the utmost gravity that tonight’s yoga was everything my body has been missing. I’m almost in tears because it feels so right, my body feels so refreshed and agile.

So yea. Yoga, good for me. 10/10 would recommend to me.



Blog challenge, episode 1

January 27th, 2018

List 20 random facts about yourself.

I feel that sometimes lists such as this slip to bragging territory, but I’m trying not to be that person. And yes, I realise I have a whole section of basically random facts about me, but I’m trying to think of something new.

-I love pens. I’m always looking for the perfect pen and quite recently I think I’ve found my favourite. It’s Pilot Frixion point 0.5, and it comes in a few colours. I’m quite sure I don’t need all of the colours, but will end up buying them anyways. And probably three black ones.

-I have a stack of ringbound planners in three sizes. I know I don’t need that many, because I only use my trusted a5 size (i mean come on, who can fit everything into a personal size?) but in my defence nearly all of them were purchased half or 75% off.

-I also have a traveler’s notebook, a cheap-arse mock one, but I still do and I just bought myself a Nuuna dot grid huuuuge notebook for bullet journaling purposes, even if I’ve tried it and didn’t like it. So now that beauty is basically just sitting on top of my desk and doing nothing. Except looking pretty.

-I haven’t had a regular skin care routine until this past christmas, when I got a set with cleanser, toner and two creams (day and night ones, naturally). I’m only stating this as a fact, with no emotional attachment to it.

-if I had to choose one activity that I would do in my spare time for the rest of my life, I’d have pretty fucking awful job deciding between writing, running and driving. I think I would choose driving, for the zen-like nature of it that I’ve gotten used to as years go by. I mean I can get peace of mind by running, but driving is my drug.

-talking of which, I used to do a lot of designated driver shit when I was younger and lying to myself about being social. At one point I calculated (for the sake of passing time) how many different makes and models of cars I’ve driven and it went to about seventy-ish then. It must be at least fifteen or twenty more now. So I think I can firmly say I’ve driven all sorts of cars. (i realise this is starting to venture to the brag-territory)

-I’m trying to read a bit more this year than the last, but I can’t seem to be able to concentrate on books. I’m hoping that it’s the genre that is putting me off. I’ve read mostly detective novels lately (hello harry hole) and I think I’m sort of so used to their format that trying to read sci-fi novels is such a different experience in comparison. I used to love my sci-fi, the classic ones, Arthur C. Clarke, Fred Hoyle and then some sort of horror hybrids. And yes, I do still love them, but I can’t commit to them, at least not at the moment.

-I love small (and a bit bigger) cosmetic bags and pouches. I have a bunch of them and I actually use quite a lot of the ones in my possession. They’re very handy when you’re changing hand-bags as frequently as many people do socks. To be honest tho, I do have a bunch of pouches I’ve not used once, and some that I’ve used only a little. But they’re a minority.

-I’m also a big hoarder of small baskets. Don’t even ask the number of Branäs -baskets in my house. It’s much like with pouches: I find them useful and buy a bunch, put stuff in it and forget about it. Then I’m doing my annual round of rummage through all your shit and throw half of it away and shit goes to tip and I’m left with extra baskets.

-I have a big stash of bracelets and wristbands. I usually wear the same combo for obscene amount of time and then change the whole lot. Last year it was paracord bracelets and leather cuffs, this year it’s black plastic sort of pearls with charms. I’m the person who adds one to each wrist every four to five weeks, end up with seventy-six million on each and then stripping them all off and starting again.

-I dye my hair a lot. I’ve started since I was maybe fourteen? and haven’t had my natural colour since then. To be honest I don’t even know what colour my hair is at this point. It might even be a little grey at parts, who knows. I’m partial to darker colours, because I feel myself more of a brunette than a blonde, but I’m not against any colour. I’ve had pretty much every colour there is, aside from grey, because my hair type is such that if I dye it silvery grey, it’ll turn into the colour of seagull shit in two weeks.

-I drink a lot of tea. About this time last year I made an order online for 1100 bags of Tetley’s tea and 1200 bags of Yorkshire tea. I mean, at the time there was not one single shop in Finland that sold Yorkshire. Now there is one supermarket chain that carries it, but the price is fucking ridiculous. I’m still drinking my 2300 bags, but I’m starting to feel a bit worried for the amount of Yorkshire left. By no means am I a snob when it comes to tea, but I admit I am a bit picky over my bags. And yes, I prefer bags since I don’t drink many mugs at once, and I can do without the hassle of loose leaf, thank you very much. Also: green tea is the stuff of Satan.

-lately, for maybe about half a year, I’ve been getting more and more into veggie based diet. I mean I have nothing against eating meat in itself, but I feel like I feel better without eating a lot of it. And to be quite frank, I don’t even like red meat that much. I have a bunch of friends (almost all of them) who always order a steak at a restaurant, because mmm yummy medium plus steak and I’m like uhhh, I’ll have the veggie main, or the chicken. I’m in no way a snob about this either, I’m not pushing my way of eating to anyone, and I don’t even intend going vegan or even totally meat-free. I just… I guess I like my veggies better.

-I don’t have a lot of handbags, I think. I mean I’m not sure how many people normally have, but I have like maybe a dozen? But before you get alarmed or scream at me for thinking that’s not a lot, let me tell you quite a few of those are bags shaped like a sheep (i’ve used that many times, but it’s sort of small-ish for everyday use) or shaped like a seal cub (it has a see-through plastic ‘belly’ and i’ve used it when going out for a bender). Quite a few of them are army surplus bags that are very practical, but not very … beautiful. I mean I like them, I’ve always been a big fan of army green colour. And none of the bags are fancy, or even brand name bags.

-as a person living this high up on the parallels, I know I should be somewhat fluent in winter sports. Like skiing. But god almighty how much I hate it. I want to like it, I want to ski, but I get blisters in my feet and I get sweaty and achy in no time at all and it all boils down to a big complain-fest anywhere between 100-300 meters. I suspect this is because I can’t ski, I don’t have the right technique. Down-hill skiing, or slalom as it was known somewhere in the dark ages, now that is my kind of skiing. You put two planks (yes two, shut up all you boarders you have two legs, you use two separate planks) on your feet, let machinery pull you on top of a hill and let gravity take you down. That’s proper skiing.

-talking about sports, a few years ago I got into Les Mills BodyCombat and haven’t been the same since. I love it, I love the feeling of being drenched in sweat and kicking and screaming your frustrations out to pumping music.

-I also love running, as I mentioned before. I don’t know what it is about it, but after the first 3-400 meters you get your breathing in check and your form right and you get your flow on and could run for ages. I only run during summers, because my lungs cannot take running in cold weather, so I have to sort of start again every spring, but so far it’s been magic. I love it, I can’t think of a better way to exercise.

-I bought a shotgun when I was studying first year at tech school. I bought it with my first batch of student loan, lol, money spent right where it was meant to. It’s a Remington 870 pump-action, a classic. I’ve hunted, for birds, a few times, but I just sort of lost interest in shooting live things, so I’ve been shooting at range. I’m not a great shot, but that’s because my practise is non-existant. I should go more, but I’ve somehow just put ot off.

-I’m a big stationary hauler. I’m loving pretty much everything from Kikki.K, and I do spend way more than I should on notebooks that I never use. I also like office supplies, and I’m about thisclose to admitting I may have a serious problem with this whole hoarding thing.

-altho, notebooks do come in handy when making lists. I love making lists. I make lists of literally everything. Shopping lists, duh, but to-do lists of every sort, lists of chores, lists of favourite things, favourite songs… I mean if I started on bullet journaling, I’m not sure there’d be room left for anything else but collections and lists.

Yea. That’s twenty then, ay? Was there anything new for you? Was anything surprising?



Humming bird

January 21st, 2018

There are times when my attention span is that of a humming bird. Today seems to be one of them.

I sit down to have a cuppa with a book that I find rather interesting (it’s full of biological terms and shit, so it’s a bit of a trying read, but i like it), otherwise I wouldn’t have bothered with it after the first sixty or so pages. I read three paragraphs and look at my phone, glance at Instagram for much needed validation (none gotten, woe), get back to the book for next two paragraphs, get my phone out again and take stupid selfies, upload them to Instagram and proceed with the book.

For ten minutes? Half a chapter? Until I get up to drag out kid’s old clothes that have gotten too small, to photograph them for selling. I put them away and decide to clean a bit in the kitchen. I put away three things (out of ten) and sit down to read. Only to get up and move to my computer to continue on what is a bit of a binge on the fifth season of A Place Called Home (i’m really liking it, i’m at episode 10 currently). I watch half of the episode and get up to get something to eat. Like a bowl of cerial. Which I decide to have at the kitchen table with the aforementioned book. Ten minutes and I’m getting up to go to my computer again.

This is hellish.

So I open youtube and put on some music (have you fucking heard Tricky & Terranova’s Bombing Bastards? or indeed Terranova’s Never? fucking amazing) and I get a moment of peace. I just sit and drown myself into the beats. But it’s only temporary. Because after the -what appears to be the threshold today- ten minutes, I’m back to scrolling planner videos and switching up inserts on my planner, because I want something new I need to make this better